The Chameleon Complex

Chameleon Complex

The Chameleon Complex  |  Timothy M. Tays, PhD Many people look good but feel bad. They are chronically stressed, sad, and anxious. They are lonely in their marriages and disconnected in their relationships. They know something is wrong but have no idea what it might be. They fear, “If you really knew me, you wouldn’t......

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Conx Prot

We humans are programmed to seek and be fulfilled by connection (e.g. to God/Higher power, with self, and to self, and with others). Unlike most other mammals (or animals in general!), we are completely dependent on that connection with a parent/caregivers for our survival not just for days, but for many years. Our basic on-going......

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Boundaries

Setting Boundaries

Self-esteem is partly determined by the ability to be truthful with a humble spirit in order to identify with the “realness” of who we are while gaining insight into our life story. No one can change what is unknown or denied. The transformation of our life script takes rigorous honesty, mentoring, reflection, self-care and a......

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Embracing Grief and Loss

Embracing Grief and Loss

Being human means being vulnerable. We are sensate creatures meant to feel and emote. We typically prefer safety and routine and when we are forced to leave all things familiar and secure due to death or loss, we experience fear and grief. In fact, we may on any given day experience loss to one degree......

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Know Thyself

Know Thyself

Intimacy is knowing and being known in a manner that creates connection and safety. I sit with many couples who want intimacy, to feel that connection, to know the friendship and passion of intimacy. However, few want to truly explore what it takes to build it. They express a desire to be known, but do......

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Sex Addiction Label: Helpful or Not?

Sex Addiction Label

It is important to note that there is no sex addiction diagnosis in the DSM V (the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual used to identify and describe psychiatric diagnosis). There is however a sex addiction label which has gained more attention in recent years. There is much discussion and at times argument, as to if sex......

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Dialectical Behavior Therapy: What is it and how can it help me?

Man smiling after dialectical behavior therapy

Dialectical Behavior Therapy, often referred to as DBT, is a form of cognitive behavioral therapy designed to teach people effective skills for living a more satisfying life. There are four main components of DBT. They are Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Distress Tolerance and Emotion Regulation. All four modules emphasize how to handle painful experiences effectively and......

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